“I'm not in the mood"—we've all either said it or heard it from a partner, right? Endless distractions, time thieves, and nuisances take a toll on our physical bodies and our mental and emotional well-being. With everything that's going on, how DO you get in the mood for s*x?
Enter spicy fantasies, a powerful weapon to help us go from zero to hero, discover new layers about ourselves and our partners, and create the ultimate pleasure and bonding experience. Think of this playbook as a journey you're embarking on with your partner to learn about each other and understand new ways to receive and give pleasure. We'll look at theory and practice and guide you through this new experience.
Although it's a well-known fact that our mental state plays a crucial role in our level of arousal (simply put, our mind makes us feel h*rny) and the quality of our int!mate experiences, the truth is that most of us tend to focus on physical sensations during s*x. We disconnect our minds from our bodies, so when we are in the moment, getting down and d!rty, our attention usually turns to the actions we engage in, the touches we feel, and the physical sensations that accompany them.
S*x should be a complete sensory experience that tantalizes our minds and our bodies. Helping the mind get in the mood and let loose should be a prerequisite for s*x. Spicy fantasies play a key role in helping us get to a mental and physical state where we're fully in tune with ourselves and ready to experience intimacy and pleasure in order to have an all-encompassing orgasmic experience.
This playbook aims to assist both partners in letting go and unleashing their spicy fantasies. We'll delve into theory to provide a psychological foundation for the power of fantasies, and then concentrate on practicing and developing skills to explore them fully.
Here's whatyou'll find in our Spicy Fantasy playbook:
It's made up of 3 chapters - theory, real-life fantasy examples, and practice.
- Diving into theory will help you understand the role fantasies play in sustaining a healthy sex life. Our gender, age, and experience are all factors that shape our fantasy preferences.
- Learning what others fantasize about can bring a sense of belonging and normalcy, so we'll share real-life fantasies from our OpenMity community members.
- Once you both feel comfortable exploring your own fantasies, you'll write three erotic stories each, following our guidelines.
- Then you'll write your own fantasy to play out with your partner.
Let your emotions do the talking
1. Each read the theory chapter.
Don't worry, this is not your boring school textbook stuff. These are eye-opening, research-based facts that justify how we feel and why we fantasize.
2. Discover what others fantasize about - sexy short stories.
Explore the sexual fantasies of our community members.
We tend to think that our fantasies are weird. Well, that's simply not true. Let's get one thing clear right away: your fantasies are normal, and most likely others share them. In this chapter, you'll read real-life fantasies (based on gender, age, location, etc.) that others have shared.
3. Practice writing your own erotic story, following our guidelines.
These stories will help you access the fantasy folder in your mind and train your creativity. The goal here is to practice putting fantasies into words and describing them. When each of you has prepared 3 stories, make a story-time date night out of it by reading out loud your fantasies to each other. It'll be amazing foreplay for the rest of the night. Feel free to discuss your stories by using the talking points we've prepared.
4. Bring your own fantasy to life.
a. one that you would like to act out with your partner.
b. one that you can't or don't want to act out yet. Some of the things that turn us on the most are the ones that can't be acted out. You'll have a chance to write them down and reveal them to your partner.
Example:
One more example
About the author
I'm Aggie, a passionate woman and a proud mother of two. I've always believed that nurturing a loving relationship amidst the hustle and bustle of everyday life is an art worth mastering. That's why, alongside my husband, we created the Dirty talk cheat sheet for her.
My journey was fueled by a deep commitment to ensuring women's pleasure and helping them experience the ecstasy of reaching org*sm. With this unique guide, I aim to empower couples to keep their desires alive, reignite their passion, and create unforgettable moments of intimacy. I want to offer a tantalizing blend of inspiration, communication, and connection that enriches relationships and leaves an indelible mark on the world of sensuality and love.
Formulated in partnership with my husband, adding a male insight ensures that these spicy conversations appeal to both parties, heightening the sincerity of the experience. As with most things in life, finding an approach that works for you and your relationship is key. Keep that in mind when reading these steamy lines.
FUN FACT:
WE ARE A SMALL BUSINESS!
We want to help remind each other about the important playful elements in bed and create the anticipation between each other.